How about "thanks" with a lukewarm handshake?

The beginning of the month we saw Teacher's Appreciation Week. We received a list of things the teacher liked and the days we were supposed to give them to her. Candy one day, fruit another, something yellow, pink, whatever. A flower. The kidlet took her teacher a piece of candy on the red day. She came home and said she was embarrassed because the other kids brought her bags of candy and not just a piece like it said on the list. She said she was glad the teacher didn't know it came from her. It kind of makes me sad and angry that the social pressure of giving because it's expected is causing my kid stress. And it's not just her teachers.
The husband is dead set against giving money for a gift certificate to be presented to the teacher at the end of the school year. He's a county employee as well. He's not anti-teachers. In fact, he comes from a family of teachers. But as he sees it, they, like him, are being compensated for what they do already. Cheap? Maybe. But I agree.
So now we're getting emails about a collection for the soccer coaches. The coach, who only coached on Tuesday night, and the assistant coach who only coached on Thursday nights. Both bailed on practices and games. This week the coach canceled practice on Tuesday even before the fields were closed due to rain. He can't make it to our last game on Saturday either. He's a nice enough guy, really friendly and likable. I just feel that if you can't give 100%, do what you say you're going to do, then don't offer to do it at all. Don't cancel practice "for lack of participation". If you have to bail on one team because you're coaching another then you're spreading yourself too thin and not being fair to the kids. Or the parents who shell out the cash.
So, in appreciation, I will shake your hand, clap you on the back and say 'Thanks for your time' but not reward you with a gift card for showing up half the time.